This morning as my daughter was getting ready for summer camp she said something that really made me think. She was deciding whether or not to wear her hair up in a pony tail. She was getting frustrated while brushing her hair. She has a very thick wavy hair. Adults would pay hundreds to have her beautiful hair. She threw down her hair brush and says, "I hate my hair, it's ugly. I am ugly. No one else has crazy hair like me." My reply was, "Number one, you are beautiful and number two I love your hair." "I love it so much I am going to start wearing mine wavy instead of straightening it every day." It didn't seem to phase her either way. It really bothered me though. It's not the first time she has said it. I don't want to hear a 7 year old say she hates how she looks. It's insane.
It made me think about how at times I have said things like, "Ugh, I need to do something with this crazy hair" or "Yeah, I have a belly...Mama is trying to lose weight." I never really thought that all of these NEGATIVE self statements could be affecting the way she looks at herself. Until now. I don't want her to think I don't like who I am. Yes, I do want to lose weight etc. but I love my body. I want her to know that I have my belly because I was blessed to carry three healthy babies in my belly. I love that gift and I will always be thankful for the wonderful experience of feeling them grow inside me. Yes, it may make it harder to lose my belly, but that too can be a learning tool for my daughters. I want them to know they can accomplish anything they put their minds to. Whether it is getting in shape, learning a new skill, applying for a job etc. The world is at their disposal.
I am not going to allow myself to make any negative comments about myself (or anyone else for that matter) in front of my girls. It is my job to teach them to love themselves. I really believe that until you truly and deeply love yourself, it is hard to love others. My goal is to show my girls that even though it is not the easiest task to lose weight; it is possible to exercise and be as healthy as you can. There are certain instances that are out of our control, but what we put in our mouths is not. We are in control of what we eat and how much we exercise.
What better way to show my girls to love themselves than for me to love me. For me to commit to exercising when I can and giving it my all. What do you want your children to learn from you today?
If you hear a voice within you say, "you cannot paint," then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. ~ Vincent Van Gogh
Hi I'm Jen, married to my best friend for 16 years and a Mom to 3 beautiful, energetic daughters. My blog is about life, learning to live with Grace and Girls Raised In The South (GRITS). Thanks for spending some time in my small part of the world! I hope you find a story you can relate to and you'll want to come back!
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